It’s happening again. Every time I read a good book (this time it was The Apothecary’s Daughter by Julie Klassen, I might even reread that book. It was one of those easy-know-what’s-going-to-happen-from-the-first-page type stories that makes me grasp the pages, transport myself into another world, and read far into the night) I end up narrating my life in my head. It’s annoying. Really annoying. It goes away after a couple of days.
Today I’m planning on a photo shoot with The Project’s finished .. product.
I finished it yesterday, and today I’ll photograph it and edit photos etc. Hopefully it’ll be up by tomorrow. Meanwhile…tidbits of my life narrated by the voice of Morgan Freeman. (Oh come on! Who else would it be?)
“Are you finished eating?” her mother asked her. She sighed, there are certain things whose finales cannot be announced, timed, or decided upon. If you are finished eating, is one of those certain things. “Yeah,” she said instead.
“Is this our row?” she asked herself as she made her way silently down the side aisle. The clipped pieces of paper on the bordo floor confirmed she was right.
Her mind was whirling. Facebook had forced upon her a new timeline, Twitter had updated to its “new” look, YouTube had changed for the third time, and Blogger’s privacy settings had updated drastically. “I can’t take it! I can’t take it!” she muttered. “Too much fickle inconsistency too fast.”
Her eyes widened as the new thought sunk in! These double worded verification words! They could be a trap! They could be a machine’s evil plan to have her write random words that would then come together and be used against her, and… (<– That's when the evil machine made her stop disclosing its evil plan.)
Ants. By the thousands. By the millions! The tiny, horrid black things had crawled under her bed because of one, solitary little popcorn. She vacuumed them.
“I christened a kitchen utensil today.” she announced. “It’s a thing. That you use to fry stuff because it’s a flat spoon type thingy but with holes in it… Apparently it’s called a skimmer, but we didn’t know what it was, so I christened it the UFO. Unidentified Frying Object. It has stuck for now. So if you ever come over, and I say we have UFOs in the kitchen..you’ll know.”
Making the Jackie Chan Wha..? face, she silently wondered, “I wonder why people decide to add me as a ‘friend’ on Facebook, and then refrain from ever acknowledging my existence in the virtual world or real world.” Then she shrugged and deleted them.
The tabs on her Internet window scrambled back and forth from one site to another. It was again one of those times when she absentmindedly switched through her open tabs because her thoughts were clashing together and crashed one on top of the other like the elephants from The Jungle Book; she was giving them time to settle in the right formation.
edited to add.
She also forgot a sweater and froze to death because librarians have super powers and never get cold. That or their cute twin set tops are very very warm.