My name is Gennifer Tudoroiu, and I am a person. You have a name, and you are a person. I can’t see your face as you read this, but I know deep down in your heart, you have struggles. We all do. Maybe you have never thought about taking your own life—or maybe you have. As devastating as it is, the Christian community isn’t immune to suicide. It would be unsafe to assume that everyone within the Christian community is immune—that suicidal thoughts aren’t something Christians may face. According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, “Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the United States. In the year 2018, 48,344 Americans died by suicide and it was estimated that 1.4 million people attempted suicide.”
1.4 million people tried to end their lives.
Whether you are someone who feels like suicide is an option, or whether you have lost someone to suicide—God sees you. He knows. In this very moment, you matter. Your life has meaning and value. Someone allowed His own life to be taken, so that there would be more to yours. So that your life could be full of hope, peace, and potential.
There is hope for everyone, yes even you. Especially you.
Your very heart is beating at this moment because there is more to you and what you are going through than you can see with human eyes. God hasn’t left. He isn’t deaf. He isn’t busy. He is in the midst of you. Psalms 46:5 says
God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved: God shall help her, and that right early.
When you reach that place where your life looks hopeless, and you are drooping under pain, pressure, and confusion—the Lord is in the midst of you. Your feelings don’t always tell you the truth, but He does. Psalms 46:6-7 continues:
The heathen raged, the kingdoms were moved: he uttered his voice, the earth melted. The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge.
He uttered his voice, and the earth melted. God is very capable of taking care of our problems.
When I have gone through the scariest and hardest moments of my life, I used certain habits to help me cling to God. I’d like to share them with you.
The first thing is to pray for strength to stop the voices inside that chant about your apparent hopelessness. Prayer brings God’s power into your presence. Inspired words explained it this way, “Prayer is the breath of the soul. It is the secret of spiritual power. No other means of grace can be substituted, and the health of the soul be preserved,” Gospel Workers 254.4.
Sometimes it’s necessary to withstand even your own voice, thoughts, and impulses. Ask God to give you the power to do that.
The second thing you can do is focus on something for which you are grateful. Even if it’s the smallest thing. It can be hard to look at the good that seems insignificant in the face of so much pain and apparent darkness; but try it! Prayer makes us able to be thankful and realize the blessings we have.
The only way to dispel the dark, is to bring in the light—so pray without ceasing and give thanks for every little and big thing.
The third thing that you can do—and this is something I resorted to heavily through a hard time in my life—is to repeat verses in your mind over and over. Respond to temptation with verses, even if you only know one verse. Use that verse. The only way to get through anything is to cling to the One who is in your midst. Cling. That word means to hold tightly. Hold on to God by placing all your weight on His word. Jesus, in the midst of starvation, a desolate wilderness, and the devil’s taunts said, “Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God” (Matthew 4:4). God’s Word is the truth; stand on that. And don’t forget—most of the time it may feel like you are holding on to God, but in reality, He is holding even more tightly to you!
The very name “Jesus” means, “rescuer, deliverer.” Say His name when you feel fearful and like the darkness has a hold of you. Believe in His name. The Bible is open about the emotions of humans who wished they might die. Job, David, Elisha. But if we continue reading, each of these men also came to know the salvation and faithfulness of God.
In Psalms 40:2-3 David says,
He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings. And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the Lord.
My dear friend, you are so precious. You are worth everything. God sent His Son to die so your life could be redeemed. Your brokenness can be redeemed. Your past, present, and future is redeemed if you will accept God’s gift. Will you accept His offer? He pursued you with unstoppable love.
Your salvation has come! Call upon the name of Jesus. You have been created to be loved by Him and to love Him in return! He is in the midst of you. He is knocking on your heart. Will you let Him in? Nothing else in this world will fill you up or give you peace like surrendering to Jesus does. I pray you say yes.
. . .because I live, ye shall live also.John 14:19